Review: BATTLE:LA

 

More like BATTLE:LAme

…Aliens invade earth and through insurmountable odds the humans triumph over the invaders…

 

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before.
Well I wish someone would’ve stopped me form seeing “BATTLE:LA”

 

Normally at this juncture,I give you a brief synopsis….but I think I’ve spoiled it enough for y’all already.

 

Well my mother always said ,if you have nothing good to say ,don’t say anything at all………………………………………………………

 

Actually ,the film isn’t THAT bad .

 

Our hero in this two hour commercial for the USMC is Aaron Eckhart.

 

Eckhart plays Staff Sgt.Michael Nantz, a career soldier with demons that taint his reputation and haunt his soul.

 

Eckhart is actually the saving grace of this film.

 

His performance was a highlight for me.

 

A modern day John Wayne.

 

As Captain America ,as Captain America can be.

 

(in fact he would’ve made a great Cap)

 

Eckhart saved humanity from the aliens..but his performance could not save this movie.

 

Unfortunately the rest of the cast is a waste too.

 

It was great to see a diverse cast..but ALL of them wasted their talent here.

 

Ramon Rodriguiez does a decent job here as Lt. Martinez.

 

(fun fact:IMDB has Rodriguez tapped to play Bosley in the TV reboot of Charlie’s Angels…interesting)

 

Michelle Rodriguez as Tech Sgt.Santos was waaaaaay better in AVATAR.

 

and shamefully ,Michael Pena as Joe Rincon has moments..I just wish there was more.
The draw here is the “realism” of how the film feels.

 

Director ,Jonathan Liebsman(Texas Chainsaw Massacre:The Beginning)

 

was inspired by real world battle footage.

 

I wish Liebsman would have used a chainsaw to shave about 30 minutes off this movie.

 

The way it was shot along with the special effects make this a film that will work only on the big screen…the viewer will lose a lot on their TV when this is released next week on DVD(just kidding).

 

Bottom line…I would have rather sat at home and watched a double feature of “Independence Day” and “War of The Worlds” than have sat through this movies.
Columbia /Sony greenlit this approx. $100 Million movie and

 

Universal said “NO” to Guillermo del Toro’s “At The Mountain of Madness” ?

 

…really Hollywood?

 

maybe del Toro should shop ATMOM over at Columbia.
’til next time Cabrones!!!
Gary
Gary “El Boy” Deocampo provides insightful profiles & reviews with his own original tongue-in-cheek, macabre, fan-boy style.

Gary was born in the City of Angels and raised on a healthy diet of Rod Serling’s The Twilight Zone, The Outer Limits, Night Gallery, The Hammer Horror Films, and his favorite, Universal Studio’s Monster Movies.

But alas, it was a film that was released in the winter of 1973, where his love and perception of all things Horror would personally change him forever. William Friedkin’s, The Exorcist was that film. To this day The Exorcist still gives him the heebie-jeebies.

Presently, his affinity for the horror genre has broadened and spans the globe. His love and appreciation for director’s Takashi Miike (Audition) and Chan-Wook Park (Old Boy) from the Far East to Sweden’s Tomas Alfredson (Let The Right One In) to his favorite, Mexico’s very own Guillermo del Toro (Cronos, Devil’s Backbone, Pan’s Labyrinth).

In his spare time he likes to exercise and/or exorcise his inner demons. The little devil still resides in the City of Angels, in a suburb founded by Puritans (!) with his lovely and patient wife, his two equally lovely and patient children, two hounds and his pet Cthulhu.

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